systlin:

spindercatscher:

ohhimarx:

Facts about my carnivorous nepenthes:

-he is old enough to go to preschool

-he is taller than I am when his vines are stretched out

-he periodically spills plant digestive fluid on me that burns until I wash it off

-he can’t stay near other plants for more than a day or two lest he try to strangle them to death

-he was solely responsible for the murder of a previous impatiens plant but he still denies it

-I once forgot him outside during an actual hurricane and he was fine

-the place I bought him from as a tiny baby monster cutting mysteriously closed down suddenly and is now a popular urban exploration site

-his name is Pitch because he’s a pitcher plant and is also satan

We had one of these at the cursed beige house. She was in a hanging pot. Her name was Marceline.

I love him.